Marietta Derangement Syndrome (MDS) Sleep Well Gummies

Combat the symptoms of political paranoia—naturally.

If you or someone you know suffers from Marietta Derangement Syndrome (MDS)—defined as:

[Mar-ee-ett-uh di-reynj-muhnt sin-drohm]
/noun/
An on-going mental condition where a person’s irrational obsession with hating Jon Marietta leads them to abandon all logic, facts, and reason—spiraling into a paranoid frenzy over a local row office holder simply doing his job.

…we’ve got just the thing.

🛌 MDS Sleep Well Gummies

Expertly formulated to promote restful sleep, support healthy circadian rhythms, and bring peace of mind—even to the most unhinged Facebook commenters.

💤 Scientifically Formulated Ingredients:

• Sodium (as Sodium Citrate)
• Vitamin B6 (as Pyridoxine HCL) – Supports nervous system and melatonin production
• Passionflower Extract – A calming herbal aid for gentle relaxation
• Melatonin – Naturally supports your sleep cycle

Flavor: Natural Passionfruit
Other Ingredients: Glucose Syrup, Sugar, Glucose, Pectin, Citric Acid, Vegetable Oil (with Carnauba Wax), Purple Carrot Juice Concentrate

✅ Real Benefits, Real Relief:

• Promotes restful, natural sleep
• Helps regulate your circadian rhythm
• Offers antioxidant support
• May reduce late-night comment-section outbursts

🏭 Manufactured with Quality:

• Packaged at FDA-registered and GMP-certified facilities
• 3rd-party laboratory tested for safety and quality
• Non-GMO and corn-free
• Ships only within the U.S. and its territories

Whether you’re a Jon Marietta supporter or just need some well-deserved rest, these gummies are the perfect blend of satire and science. Great as a gift, stocking stuffer, or nighttime dose of truth.